tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-69406922012-02-16T07:19:54.160-08:00The posts and comments on this site are not intended to be factual statements and the opinions expressed herein are not worth the ink they're printed with. -- TheRealGrumpyThe Real Grumpynoreply@blogger.comBlogger231100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6940692.post-73265493568827394672011-12-09T22:46:00.000-08:002011-12-09T22:46:02.621-08:00

It has certainly been a while since I've graced this blog with a post—over 4 years, to be exact. No, I didn't just wake from a coma, nor was I incarcerated, nor did I just return from being stranded on a desert island. I just didn't feel like writing anything. It certainly wasn't writer's block. I can think of lots of things to write about and usually don't have any problem putting the words

The Real Grumpynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6940692.post-7223995095623745932007-08-30T19:57:00.000-07:002007-08-30T21:21:15.131-07:00

Following Senator Larry Craig's arrest for disorderly conduct in a bathroom stall at the Minneapolis airport, Grumpy would like to offer tips for the men out there who are not looking for sexual contact in a bathroom, but whose personal habits might inadvertently lead them to fall victim to a bathroom sting operation. Yes, we all know Sen. Craig is innocent (he said so, didn't he?); he just

The Real Grumpynoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6940692.post-30003063747781494752007-08-27T21:27:00.000-07:002007-08-27T21:45:41.220-07:00

Dear President Bush:Please appoint me as your new Attorney General. I have many of the same qualities you have come to admire in your current [outgoing] AG Gonzales:I have watched many hours of Law and Order (ka-chung), from which I have gained a great knowledge of legal matters.I have a very bad memory. To help me with this, I have written the following on a small piece of paper (which I carry

The Real Grumpynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6940692.post-52224070519073323912007-03-12T20:44:00.000-07:002007-03-12T21:19:03.741-07:00

There are wildfires in southern California. I know it, because I've seen it on the tv and Internet news sites (such as Yahoo! News and Google News) also have stories about the fires. The wildfires have been big stories for the last few days. But, aside from knowing that the fires are somewhere near Anaheim or are in Orange county, just try to figure out—using the Internet—exactly where the

The Real Grumpynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6940692.post-1163052595144663162006-11-08T22:01:00.000-08:002006-11-08T22:09:55.170-08:00

… or How to Make Sure No One Reads Your EULA. Enlarge the image to see an example of how not to present your EULA. Would you bother to read this? Corel seems to think their customers might. I doubt it.

The Real Grumpynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6940692.post-1158728710427116912006-09-19T22:05:00.000-07:002006-09-19T22:17:59.093-07:00

Check out this news release from the Massachusetts Institute of Technology (MIT). MIT is developing a micro gas turbine engine the size of a computer chip that "could run 10 times longer than a battery of the same weight."I wonder, though: How's it going to work at the gas station? "Hi. Fill up the car. And, I'd like a quarter ounce of Premium in my laptop." If you think exploding lithium

The Real Grumpynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6940692.post-1155184727805228112006-08-09T21:20:00.000-07:002006-08-09T21:38:47.826-07:00

For several days the Oregonion has treated us to two articles (Aug. 6, Aug. 8), an editorial and an opinion piece about the proposed land swap deal on Mt. Hood. This deal, brokered by Representatives Earl Blumenauer (D) and Greg Walden (R), proposes to swap U.S. government land in the Government Camp area for land currently owned by Mt. Hood Meadows Oregon LP, a limited partnership controlled

The Real Grumpynoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6940692.post-1154044176762110032006-07-27T16:38:00.000-07:002006-07-27T18:37:14.220-07:00

So, we don't have "global warming?" Tell that to everyone in the United States on Tuesday, July 25th. The image in this post shows the projected high temperatures for the United States on Tuesday. With the exception of far northwest Washington state and the far northeast, the rest of the states were in the 90's or above. Any way you look at it, we were warm.

The Real Grumpynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6940692.post-1145822112898485152006-04-23T11:32:00.000-07:002006-04-23T12:55:12.943-07:00

Most likely, it's Jupiter. The photo to the left is how Jupiter would look tonight as viewed through a fairly powerful telescope. This image is from the wonderful (and free) Stellarium planetarium program.This image shows what you'll see if you look outside at about 1 a.m, looking south from Portland. What's that bright object just below and to the right of Jupiter? Is it one of Jupiter's

The Real Grumpynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6940692.post-1144901283040303942006-04-12T21:01:00.000-07:002006-08-15T16:04:02.173-07:00

I've always had trouble tying my shoelaces. Either I've tied the laces too loose, and they come untied while I'm walking, or I've tied them too tight, and cut-off the circulation in my feet. Either way, it's a problem.Now, along comes Ian's Shoelace Site, with many helpful hints (including diagrams) as to how you can both lace, and tie, your shoelaces. With a little practice, maybe I can

The Real Grumpynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6940692.post-1141588484301712052006-03-05T11:51:00.000-08:002006-03-05T11:54:44.310-08:00

Need we say more?

The Real Grumpynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6940692.post-1137632904595739772006-01-18T17:01:00.000-08:002006-01-18T17:23:23.260-08:00

Australia's Jelena Dokic proves that, in tennis, it's always a good idea to keep your eye on the ball.Photo courtesy Agence France-Presse (AFP) from the 2006 Australian Open.More 2006 Australian Open photos.

The Real Grumpynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6940692.post-1136235753106423872006-01-02T12:53:00.000-08:002006-01-02T13:02:33.116-08:00

MSNBC-TV just reported that the murder rate in New Orleans, compared to 2004, dropped 70% in 2005. Huh? Note to MSNBC-TV: There's no one there!Later in the same report, they did state that the population of New Orleans is down 71% from 2004. What are these folks smoking?

The Real Grumpynoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6940692.post-1135839215091744622005-12-28T22:42:00.000-08:002005-12-28T22:53:35.100-08:00

This item (via Boing Boing) about 250-pounds of Silly Putty reminds me of something that I saw in Japan a few years back. Click the photo to see (safe for work).

The Real Grumpynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6940692.post-1135706551592934172005-12-27T09:43:00.000-08:002005-12-27T13:22:40.896-08:00

From today's news (Yahoo News story):“Oprah Winfrey's private jet was forced to return to the city airport after its windshield was cracked in a collision with a bird, officials said. Winfrey and her boyfriend, Stedman Graham, were not hurt in the incident...”But, what about the pilots? The story doesn't even mention them? Are we to assume that either Oprah or Stedman were flying the plane?

The Real Grumpynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6940692.post-1135230060529476452005-12-21T21:37:00.000-08:002005-12-21T21:41:00.530-08:00

Need we say anything more?

The Real Grumpynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6940692.post-1135228445218715572005-12-21T21:10:00.000-08:002005-12-27T13:21:07.076-08:00

“We're not letting you out of that snowbank until you tell us what we want to know.”

The Real Grumpynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6940692.post-1134786314648793152005-12-16T18:20:00.000-08:002005-12-16T18:31:40.903-08:00

I cancelled my Typepad account Thursday morning and, by Thursday night, all of Typepad was down. It had to be me. I'm sorry, I didn't know I had that much power. I will try to use my power more wisely from now on.

The Real Grumpynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6940692.post-1133508152596452732005-12-01T23:11:00.000-08:002005-12-16T18:32:58.470-08:00

Remember bread machines? About 15 years ago they were all the rage. What happened to them? Does anyone still sell them? Are they worth the bother?Looks like Amazon is still selling them, with prices ranging from $39 to $250. So which is better: The 1-pound or 2-pound machines? The 1-loaf or 2-loaf machines? Are the Zojirushi machines really worth the $200 price tag? I guess I should just

The Real Grumpynoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6940692.post-1133410462831281932005-11-30T20:11:00.000-08:002005-12-21T21:15:35.250-08:00

President Bush today managed to put 75% of the Naval Academy midshipmen to sleep. Of course, this was just while waiting for him to show up. Or was it?

The Real Grumpynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6940692.post-1131080369358512292005-11-03T20:58:00.000-08:002005-11-03T20:59:29.376-08:00

Immediate need for an impartial judge in Texas. Must not belong to, nor have ever contributed to, any political party (especially Democratic or Republican). Must have a squeaky-clean record (and we mean squeaky-clean), as your entire life will no doubt be reviewed by partisan hacks (and most likely dragged through the mud). Must have a high tolerance for political B.S. and be able to stomach

The Real Grumpynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6940692.post-1130724320494017542005-10-30T18:03:00.000-08:002005-10-30T18:05:20.496-08:00

This year marks the end of an era for the Grumpy household: son #2 has finally reached that age (12) where it's no longer cool to go door-to-door in the neighborhood begging trick or treating for candy. It was his own decision (maybe helped along by Mom's promise that he could have all of the candy that we don't distribute to the beggars trick or treaters). In a way, it's a sad time for

The Real Grumpynoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6940692.post-1101275912271942742004-11-23T21:58:00.000-08:002005-12-21T21:16:58.450-08:00

Saturn's rings from the Cassini space probe (20040902).

The Real Grumpynoreply@blogger.com0